The Bad Sex Awards should be required reading for any writer pondering just what kind of metaphor or adjective will best capture the physical act of love, but if you are still tempted by graphic sex in your writing, perhaps these words will dissuade you, as expressed by good old Mary Renault…

“If characters have come to life, one should know how they will make love; if not it doesn’t matter. Inch-by-inch physical descriptions are the ketchup of the literary cuisine, only required by the insipid dish or by the diner without a palate.”